Women Doing More

Help End Slavery

2009-10-16T08:49:00.010-04:00

When a friend of mine told me her job at a little hole in the wall restaurant was slavery, I thought she was exaggerating. Perhaps I was wrong. Check out this map of slavery locations across the US.

Many of you know, I am in love with photography. Love it. There's a great photography blog I follow HERE and his blog introduced me to this very cool group called Not For Sale.

Not for Sale is a group passionately dedicated to eradicating slavery around the world and they have a whole list of things people can do to help.

Definitely go check them out.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Blog about this.

Pick one of their action items that fits you best HERE.

Fun Charity Event at Macy's TONIGHT!

2009-09-15T07:16:00.004-04:00

I apologize for the short notice, but I just found out about this event and it sounds like so much FUN!

Macy's stores coast to coast are hosting the world's largest dinner party tonight with all donations going to "Feeding America" and their network of foodbanks.

Here's how it works:
At 6pm Tonight September 15 Macy's stores across the country will be giving out a complimentary first course tasting and recipe from one of their celebrity chefs. Very cool.

While you are there you can show your support by making a donation, as small or large as your budget allows. Macy's will match donations to provide up to 10 million meals for families in need. Each $1 donation provides 7 meals for "Feeding America's" network of food banks.

How cool is that? With a $1 donation, you can provide up to 14 meals for those in need (including the Macy's matching)! If I didn't have parent teacher conferences tonight, I would be ALL OVER THIS!

Fortunately, there is another option for those who can't make this last minute dinner party, you can host your own dinner party on a more convenient night and Macy's will still match any donations you collect! They've even recruited Martha Stewart to help with invitations and theme choices :D More details about this option HERE.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Check to see if your Macy's is participating in this event HERE.

Go to Macy's tonight, get a free yummy taste, a new great recipe, and donate something from you spare change elephant bank.

Blog about this! Spread the word!

Host your own dinner party and collect donations for "Feeding America".

Tell me how it was if you go tonight! I'm so sad I can't make it.

Help Stop Violence Against Women

2009-08-29T08:49:00.000-04:00

We've talked about the problem of violence against women here before. The International Violence Against Women Act is a new act designed to globally address violence against women.

You can read the background and see some heart wrenching slide shows HERE.

Please encourage your elected officials to step up their efforts to protect women and children from senseless acts of violence by supporting the International Violence Against Women Act I-VAWA.

There is an easy to fill out form and letter HERE. It just takes a minute.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Fill out this form and encourage your elected officials to make protecting women a priority.
Mention this on your blog to help spread the word.
Smile, kiss a loved one, and be grateful for your blessings.

Talk to Your Children About Gangs

2009-08-23T12:37:00.001-04:00

I am part of the presidency of a group of women in my area called the Relief Society. Not too long ago, we invited a retired police officer now working as a gang specialist to one of our meetings to help educate us on gangs and how they can affect our families.

He told us that even though we live in one of the safest cities in the nation, we still have representatives from approximately 150 gangs in our city. That shocked me.

But the real shocker. Gangs start recruiting at age...SEVEN!

My oldest son just turned seven and talking to him about gangs seems almost absurd. He's so young and pure and innocent still, but I guess it's a little like talking about drugs. Better safe than sorry. Since the beginning of the school year is upon us, I thought it appropriate to pass the word along.

WHAT CAN YOU DO:

Talk to your children about the difference between gangs and real friends. If it helps, I defined gangs for my children (ages 7 and 5) as: groups of people who keep secrets about doing bad things.
Share your ideas. Comment and tell us how you have addressed or plan to address the subject of gangs with your children.
Don't forget to nominate something for our Featured Causes. As of yet we don't have any nominations, so if you're sort of thinking about something but have been too shy to actually email me about it, you've got a great shot!!

Featured Cause Nominations

2009-08-17T12:50:00.009-04:00

Alright it's time to introduce our:

Featured Cause Nominations!!!

I am a stay at home mom with three little boys and although I know I am doing noble work, I still feel like perhaps I could be doing just a little bit more outside the walls of my home; but it's difficult to know where to start. That idea is really what founded this blog to begin with.

I don't have a lot of spare money hanging around, and I don't have a lot of child free time to run out and build a house or volunteer somewhere, but I do have a lot of love to give and I'm always looking for ways to help where I can. I know by the response to this blog that many of you feel the same way.

So here's the deal: if you know of a concrete way a group of busy moms and women can help you or someone you know in some small way (like signing a petition, writing a letter, making a baby blanket, calling our elected officials, donating our spare change, or something like that) tell me about it. I will pick my favorite one each month or so and feature it here.

TO NOMINATE A CAUSE:
Send an email with the subject "Featured Cause Nomination" to mamma_christine@hotmail.com describing your cause and why it would be a good thing to be featured on Women Doing More.

NOTE: Please don't leave nominations in comments here or they will get sent to another email account and I will likely lose them.

WINNING CAUSES WILL RECEIVE:

A post on this blog dedicated to your cause encouraging all my readers to participate and spread the word.

A very basic button other bloggers can post on their sites to help spread the word farther.

A summary of your cause posted at the top of my blog for at least a month.

Added to our list of worthy causes (where appropriate).

So let the nominations begin. I will be accepting nominations through the end of the month.

Our Favorite Things

2008-11-13T12:00:00.020-05:00

Here is the list of our
FAVORITE THINGS:

Find a charity you can trust.

For $1.50, a baby can go home in a soft blanket instead of a plastic bag.

The non-profit organization dedicated to ending genocide.

Play a game that donates rice to feed the world's hungry.

Helping women survivors of war rebuild their lives.

Anything to save a child from a preventable death.

An attempt to harness the power of the blogosphere by uniting bloggers to write about a particular subject on 1 day of the month.

A non-profit organization helping refugees relocate family and friends.

LDS Humanitarian Services Current Needs

Play a game that donates water to people who live in extreme poverty.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Pick your favorite thing.

Start a spare change elephant bank.

When your bank is full, donate the change to your favorite thing.

Let us know if there is anything else we should add to this list! We'll keep it current and easy to find with a link on our sidebar.

I've Returned With My Apologies

2009-08-13T15:07:00.005-04:00

Hello everyone (if anyone is still out there...hello, hello, hello?) I must apologize for my prolonged absence. This blog got bigger than I anticipated faster than I anticipated and my family needed me to step away for a little while.

I do love this blog and I love the idea and I plan to continue. Slowly. The best thing any of us can do to help the world is love those around us, right?

So if you still want to read me, I will still keep writing. I think I will hold off on any guest writers for the time being because responding to all you wonderful women took more time than I had to give.

I plan to continue our "Featured Causes" though because those turned out to be one of the most rewarding parts of doing this blog. I promise to post instructions soon for how to submit a cause to be featured on "Women Doing More".

Until then, I will leave you with this thought:

Friendship is designed to revolutionize and civilize the world, and cause wars and contentions to cease and men to become friends and brothers...it unites the human family with its happy influence. --Joseph Smith

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Reach out to an old friend.
Comment and let me know if you're still willing to read this blog every once in a while :)

Lord's Resistance Army

2009-03-25T18:02:00.003-04:00

I'm not a big fan of Law and Order SVU. It gives me nightmares and typically I avoid it like the plague, but the March 31st episode might be interesting for those of you interested in Africa.

The episode is going to feature a story of the Lord's Resistance Army which has caused untold numbers of tragedies and horrors. It will be ugly. It will be emotional. But can we ignore something that's happening just because it makes us uncomfortable?

That's something we can only answer individually.

Staff members of the Enough Project- the project to end genocide and crimes against humanity served as consultants for the television program.

A clip of the show can be found here. WARNING: even the clip is a bit graphic for those who are sensitive to violence.

More information from Enough on the Lord's Resistance Army can be found here.

I always feel better after watching or learning about something terrible if there is something I can do about it. After you watch the show, here are things you can do:

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Educate yourself. Watch the show and read the information on Enough's website.
Blog about it and educate others.
Go to our helpful links and email your elected representatives. Tell them what you've learned and plead with them not to forget those who are suffering.

Compassion Blogging: Global Food Crisis

2009-03-11T08:34:00.001-04:00

WHAT IS GLOBAL FOOD CRISIS DAY?
Compassion International is partnering with radio stations, media, churches and bloggers to spread the word about the Global Food Crisis and raise funds that will make a real difference to those impacted by it.

WHY IS THE CRISIS?
Overshadowed by recent political and financial economic news, the UN World Food Programme calls the current global food crisis “a phenomenon, a silent tsunami,” that is affecting millions of families in every nation on every continent. This global food crisis is more rapid, urgent and devastating than any other in the history of our planet.

WHY IS THE CRISIS HAPPENING?
The cost of food staples have roughly doubled in many countries where Compassion serves. Some of the original factors that turned this trend into a world calamity recently include unstable oil prices, increased meat consumption in countries like India and China, droughts in major crop-producing countries, and increased production of biofuels.

WHAT DOES THE GLOBAL FOOD CRISIS FUND DO?- Provides food vouchers to children and families needing immediate relief.- Provides seeds and agricultural tools so that families can grow their own food as well as earn extra income.- Provides supplemental nutrition services at Compassion-assisted centers around the world.

WHAT CAN YOU DO?
Visit http://www.compassion.com/please to learn more about the Global Food Crisis and donate to Compassion's Global Food Crisis Fund.

Add a Global Food Crisis widget to their blog sidebar or posts: http://share-compassion.org/gfc/

ADDITIONAL RESOURCES:
Official Global Food Crisis Day page: http://www.compassion.com/please

Compassion International's blog has several excellent posts on the Global Food Crisis: http://blog.compassion.com/tag/global-food-crisis

** Copied from an email by Shaun Groves Compassion Bloggers 1-888-435-3336

Anthony

2009-03-07T08:48:00.011-05:00

At lunch one December day my Aunt shared with me some of her feelings about the loss of my cousin Anthony. He was stillborn. It was near his birthday, December 6th.

His loss has given me a gift of love in my life as my sweet Aunt has cared for me and loved me through my difficult times and trials with abuse and abandonment.

She shared:

"On Thanksgiving Day in 1974 the baby I was carrying was no longer moving.

At that time I was about eight months pregnant and knew that the large spot of blood in my bed was not good news. I waited all day for my little one to move.

The next day I went to the doctor and was told that he thought he could hear the baby’s heart beat and that all was okay.

One week later on December 6^th, I went into labor. At that point they knew my baby was dead and I was in a room with another lady who was giving birth to a live baby.

As I listened to her cry, moan, groan, and curse I remember making a hard judgment of her; for she was going to giving birth a live baby.

After both our babies were born we returned to the same room and it was just before evening visiting hours. I watched all her family walk into the room and be so joyful; each giving me a brief little glance.

Then they would all run to the nursery to look at her baby.

I phoned my doctor and told him I was leaving the hospital.

I remember vividly, to this day, the emotion of being wheeled out of the maternity ward, past the nursery and many people I knew. I worked at the physicians’ office where most of them came for care.

A couple of days later my best friend had her baby. Another good friend had her little baby boy a few days after that; he lived for only a couple of days.

I was so confused by everything that had happened. I felt abused by someone; anger, sadness, loneliness, confusion, and fear. Was I actually supposed to go home and act as if nothing had happened?

Today there are photos, clothing, hand and footprints, blankets and time to hold and bond.

Choices are given for burials, and those mothers’ experiencing losses are NEVER left in a maternity unit.

Somehow, I was happy for them, yet still angry that I had nothing; not even a face to close my eyes and see. No place to go to mourn and place flowers, no one to talk to about how I felt.

Even in my happiness that women have these things I realize that they still really have nothing and that what has happened to them is confusing, painful,;feelings of abandonment, fears, frustration are present in their loss. Even what they have is little compared to the tremendous pain and weight of losing a baby.

I returned to work, where people brought in neglected children; abused children, and even women pregnant sad about it, “just one more child”, and one wondering where she could have an abortion.

I remember thinking that if they were not good mom’s then why did He take mine away from me.

I came to the conclusion that maybe I was not going to be a good mother and thus I was not going to have any.

Everyone had the wrong thing to do or say on the wrong day. Looking back, for the most part, they meant well; however, at the time it all hurt. My husband continued life as if nothing had happened.

I searched for answers; as to if he was part of my eternal family. He was alive, I had felt him move, no he didn’t breath earthly air, but I reassured myself that he was my son and we gave him the name we had chosen for him, Anthony Orgera Hansen.

I was frightened to get pregnant for fear I would suffer another loss and I still was confused with the first loss. I found one piece of information that I held tightly to and that was a few paragraphs under the word “Stillborn”, in Mormon Doctrine by Elder Bruce R. McConkie. Each day I went to work I would look at the autopsy report in my medical chart that said perfectly formed male fetus…

When I quit work I wished I had made a copy of it because it was all I had of him and I missed reading it.

I went on to have another son, which according to my mother-in-law was my first son and he had finally made it here. I soon came to see that I could only keep my deepest feelings to myself.

Each of my pregnancies was not without its own scare.

One I hemorrhaged, one I was in a car accident and it caused her to have her meconium stool and internal bleeding, the next a slow heart beat from medication, and the last a miracle baby after five years, small and her umbilical cord wrapped around her neck, only alive because the physician never left my side.

She was back in the hospital with Spinal Meningitis in just a few weeks and I was sure that this was going to end up with another loss. She finally took a turn uphill towards good health and we returned home with little side effects.

My husband never spoke of Anthony and never seemed to understand my feelings around the first part of December.

My children had many questions throughout the years, many I was not prepared to answer. They had their own concerns and mourning over a lost brother. They would mention Anthony and I would cry and then that child would be in trouble for talking about him and making mom cry.

Other years there were no tears and they would all talk about him. My oldest daughter upon having her second baby in 1999 informed us upon arrival at the hospital, that if it were alright with me she would like to name her second son, Anthony, after her older brother.

What could I say but, “Yes”.

On the way home I cried and yelled out loud, “why can she have her Anthony and I couldn’t have mine”?

Now, what a dear grandson he is to me and how honored I am.

What a selfish and terrible person I had been for just a few short moments. He is so tender and he loves to have me hold him, talk and sing to him; her Anthony, our Anthony helps me feel peace.

Finally in 1994 my husband, as Bishop (LDS), presided and spoke at a graveside service for a still born baby in our Ward. He cried and had the most difficult time speaking.

After, as we had lunch together. He then began to explain that it had taken him twenty years to mourn and that all the emotion and tears where about Anthony.

In 1994 I was in Day Murray Music in Murray, Utah, shopping for music. It was the holiday season and a little green book caught my attention, copyrighted in 1993. It was December and just before Anthony’s birthday.

It was called “TheChristmas Box”, by Richard Paul Evans; it was my peace. According to the author, whom I have come to know personally, he never placed any books there to be sold.

He admits the even though the book is not about loss of stillborn babies that it took off on its own and became a meaning of it’s own to whom every read it.

My husband then began to help me heal with gifts to place by my little green book [The Christmas Box by Richard Paul Evans, see below for more about it].

The gifts from my husband included baby socks, a small statue of “The Angel Statue” and a glass red rose, that lies at the feet of the angel. My husband, and Anthony's father, feels of his presence and many times after a family party he tells me how he felt that someone was missing.

Finally, what a healing time this was for me.

People who have lost children, in all circumstances are brought to peace by reading ihe Christmas Box.

In 1996, in the Salt Lake City Cemetery, there was an angel monument placed and dedicated for all those who had lost a child. It took me a couple of years to have enough courage to go to the program held each year on December 6^th. When I went I brought home a white rose, which I still have in my bedroom. I have never returned, because it was all I needed. My son is not buried there and so many people grieving over so many lost children come every year, there is little room and I want them to have the opportunity to feel as I felt; comforted and peace.

I have read each of Richard Paul Evans books, been at his first signings, each book and began to donate to the “Christmas Box International”.

When I finally took my “little green book” for him to sign, he wanted to know if I knew how much it was worth. I told him that I did and I would never part with it.

Each year we have donated to “The Christmas Box International”. This year I was invited to a breakfast at the Little America Hotel.

I went planning to make my donation and enjoy the morning. I sat and listened to where my money had been going all those years; to the Christmas Box House and boxes for those leaving foster care.

It was something I knew, however it had never hit me that I was helping neglected and abused children. I listened to Richard Paul Evans. An abused eighteen year old with six brothers all went to The Christmas Box House. A mother who is fighting drug abuse and her gratefulness for The Christmas Box House.

We watched a video about all the Foundation is doing.

All of a sudden I felt compassion to help and not just with financial donations. I realized where I needed to begin and the doors began to open that very day.

It is slowly coming to place and it will help some loved ones who are already near and dear to my heart.

Once they are healing, then I will move on to volunteering for The Christmas Box International.

I was amazed that it all began with a loss of my baby and yet from that loss it took a turn into a road I did not even realize.

It had turned into another loss, the loss of my loved ones childhood, and helping them heal is something that is very passionate to me.

I was asked by one of those dear ones, which I will help, to write these feelings down so that she could write about it.

We ate lunch and talked about it and she asked me to write many of the things we had talked about.

I have been running on a treadmill of life since then and tonight the eve of Anthony’s 34^th birthday I write this in his honor and in the honor of those whom I loved who have been neglected and abused.

Throughout the years how the Lord’s hands direct our lives and He is guiding us, if we will quietly listen and then respond."

Her heart wrenching experience here so bravely shared is such a testament to many of us. Her love of me, and my sisters and brothers, who were subjected to abuse and abandonment in our childhood, is so prevalent, and she is helping us to heal.

Those of us who have not experienced loss can learn to be more sensitive and kind to those women and men who mourn from losing a child.

Those of us who have suffered loss in our lives can learn to overcome that loss by reaching out of our pain to do a great deal of good for others.

My Aunt is a special woman. She has certainly suffered pain in her life. From doubt each time that she carried one of her living children, that that child might not make it. Wonder, will I have the privileged of being a part of this son's life, someday. So many unanswered questions.

But what I know of her and who she has become is that through her loss she is someone who in my suffering of abuse and abandonment has blessed my life. She found a way to give something to others, a way to heal the hurt and aching of her loss. A way to fill someone else loss; the loss of home, and nurturing and love.

These children who benefit from the donations to the Christmas Box may never know that a small part of their safety came from one woman, a woman who lost her own child.

What are you doing with your loss, your hardship, your sadness. There are so many opportunities to give in our world. Your time, your talent, your smile. Little kindnesses add up to big wealth and health to the person who receives from you.

The Christmas Box...

Richard Paul Evans book The Christmas Box talks about a woman who grieves the loss of her child at the base of the Angel Statue,;which once was located in Salt Lake City. This original statue was destroyed by a flood, but later replaced due to Evans generous donations.

Every year, on December 6th, ironically Anthony's birthday, there is a opportunity for families to gather at the new statue for grieving and support.

From Barns and Noble.com: Since it was first published, more than seven million people have been touched by the magic of The Christmas Box, a holiday classic that is as beloved in our time as A Christmas Carol was in Dickens's.

When Richard Paul Evans wrote The Christmas Box, he intended it as a private expression of love for his two young daughters, Jenna and Allyson. Though he often told them that he loved them, he didn't feel that they could ever really understand the depth of his feelings until they had experienced the joy of rearing their own children, and by that time their relationship would have changed forever. In writing The Christmas Box, he hoped that at some time in the future they would read the book and know of their father's love.

As Evans began to write, he was amazed at the inspiration that flowed into his mind and heart. He completed the moving story of a widow and the young family who comes to live with her in less than six weeks, and bound twenty copies to give as Christmas presents to family and friends. In the following weeks, those twenty copies were shared and passed along from family to family, from friend to friend, and what began as a tale for two little girls became a message of miracles, hope, and healing for people throughout the world.

The Angel is called the Angel of Hope.

Letters from mothers are often left at the base of the statue. There is a lot of information you can find about the Christmas Box and the Angel of Hope. Evans has also published a story about the story of the Christmas Box, which describes his experience with this story of Fiction that would bring such comfort to so many non-Fiction experiences.

The Christmas Box Miracle is the story behind the book that has become a Christmas classic: how a man writes and publishes a book which helps grieving people to heal and lost souls to find their way home. It is Evans's story: his own spiritual journey and stories of people he encountered along the way — miraculous stories of healing and divinity that often defy explanation.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Help others who are grieving by listening to their story.
Don't make their loss or grief about you or your experiences; really be there for them in their pain.
Seek to find ways to help grieving mothers and fathers.
Look for opportunities in your own pain and loss to give to less fortunate.
Use your pain and trials to do good in the lives of others.
Recognize abused and abandoned children and find ways to help where you can.
Look at those closest to you and really seek to lift and love them.
Donate your time or financial support to the Christmas Box organization, or to organizations in your areas which help abused and abandoned children.
HUG KIDS or Appreciate Those Who Do.

Help for mothers and fathers grieving:

Stepping Stones Blog is an insightful and well written effort to express life and loss.

...also:

“Now I Lay ME Down To Sleep” http://www.nowilaymedowntosleep.org/, national photographers, who go unpaid to the hospitals, and take pictures of stillborn and dying babies and then give a C.D. and photos to the mother.

Salt Lake chapter is called, http://impressionsoftheheart.org/#

Julie Hansen Williams: her web page has some Richard Paul Evans items. Additionally she is part of the Salt Lake City chapter and does amazing photography and has done so many that she knows how to handle each situation with love and grace. http://juliewilliamsphotography.com/blog/

**Many thanks to Stacie and her Aunt Liz for this tender and touching piece. Thank you for sharing.

An Inspired Girl's Night Out

2009-02-23T08:48:00.000-05:00

On March 5th, more than 440 movie theatres across the country are going to be featuring a documentary called A Powerful Noise. It's about three women from developing countries who are working to better their communities.

Go to apowerfulnoise.org for more information.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Get inspired: go see the movie.
Spread the word: blog about the movie, plan a girl's night out and take your friends to see the movie.

**Many thanks to my dear friend Kirsty for sending me this idea. Her mom is currently serving a mission in Africa, check out the baby blankets link on our sidebar!

Book Review: Be the Change You Want to See in the World

2009-02-20T08:33:00.006-05:00

Here is another book I was asked to review on my site. How fun!

Be the Change You Want to See in the World by Julie Fisher-McGarry is a book written by an extremely passionate woman. Julie Fisher-McGarry is all heart. She loves animals. She loves people. She loves the earth. And she seems to be doing everything she knows to be the best person she can be. This book is her way of sharing the things she's learned.

It's written in calendar format with one thought for every day of the year. She has some very informational entries and some more whimsical entries. My favorite entries by far were her recipes. Every few pages she throws in one of her own personal recipes and they all sound very yummy and VERY healthy.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Read the book.
Make small changes in your own life to better the world around you.
Let me know if you want my copy of the book - first person who asks can have it.

Become a CASA Volunteer

2009-02-09T09:11:00.000-05:00

I don't know about all of you but I've often thought about becoming a foster parent. Unfortunately it's never seemed the right time or place. Right now I have my hands more than full with just my own little ones.

Nevertheless, the stories on the news break my heart and I long for ways to help.

I was talking to an old high school friend about this desire and he mentioned the CASA program. I knew immediately I needed to post about this. It's great!

CASA stands for Court Appointed Special Advocate and basically what you do is get 30 hours of training and then the court assigns you a child and you become their special advocate until they are placed in a stable home situation.

The time involved averages about 10 hours per month. From what I understand the advocate's job is to basically communicate with all the adults involved in the child's life (social workers, lawyers, teachers, parents, etc), combine all the expert observations with what the child actually wants; and advocate for the best possible outcome.

In so doing, you become a friendly stable face the child can rely on to help plead their cause. I'm not doing this justice. Definitely go check out the website!! The videos are priceless.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Check out the CASA website (in the top right hand corner there's a search button to find a local program near you).

Consider donating 10 hours a month to advocate for a child who needs you.

Women Doing More at Home

2009-02-05T09:16:00.002-05:00

In a goal setting seminar I gave at church a few years ago, I made a couple of life goals for myself: to be a great mother and a great wife. I’ve been thinking about “women doing more” and what that means to me. I’ve also been asking myself what truly matters in life. I find myself coming back to those two goals. I read this idea recently from Dave Ramsey (the money makeover guy) quoting one of his pastors, “Doing the right thing may be difficult, but it’s not complicated.”

For me, being a great mother and wife is difficult, but it isn’t complicated. Well, maybe a little. I have four children and one on the way. I feel like I take pretty good care of them; I feed them healthy food, I take them to lessons and make sure they work hard in school and sometimes at home. I try to teach them of truths and important ideas. But, I realize that I am not always here present with them.

My daughter is in third grade. She is smart and sweet, but I can see that she lacks a strong sense of herself and I can see that it grows out of a lack of parental attention. I’m a stay-at-home mom, but sometimes my brain is somewhere else. Some nights as I put her to bed, she will ask me if we can do something fun together after school the next day and I’ll say yes, that would be nice. Then after school comes and I’m cleaning the fridge or involved in a phone conversation, online or…fill in the blanks. She comes home and watches TV or reads a book (sometime with me, I’m not that out of it). Then I have her help clear the table, we eat dinner, I ask if she’s done her homework and it’s time to go to bed again and she might say, “Can we do something fun together tomorrow?”

I have a teenager too. He’s a great kid. Everyone tells me that. And I know it too. But I think he might not believe that I think that. He’s my oldest and I’ve tried to be open with him about my mistakes as a parent and let him know I love him, but am learning with him. I struggle with knowing where to draw the line between showing love and making sure he’s doing the right thing and telling him what to do. (My other two and a half kids are at easier stages, but I hope I will be there more for them too.)

In college, I never took a single parenting or marriage class even though what I knew I wanted most was to be a wife and mother. I was so sure (insert proud) that I knew how to be a great parent and spouse. I didn’t think I needed anyone else’s advice in this personal area. I am a real do-it-yourselfer type (I even cut my own hair). Only now as I’m getting a little older, hopefully wiser and more humble, I am starting to see that this attitude of doing everything myself is not always the optimal path (I should’ve been able to tell that by the state of my hair!).

I could try to blame the kind of parent I am on the kind of parenting I received. It was pretty hands off. I used to hide to see if anyone would notice. They didn’t. But they didn’t know I was hiding. I didn’t ask for “doing something together after school” only to have it ignored. I can focus on a few negative moments and use them as excuses for my parental defects, or remember the many good things my parents did, from reading to me at night to taking us on family vacations. I have to accept responsibility for my own choices. But, I can also change my behavior. And that’s why I’m writing this essay about what we as women can do more of, being present with our children and spouse. What can you change about the way you treat the most important people in your life (and I’m not talking about more spa time for you)?

As far as the great wife goal, I’ll leave that for another post.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Call it a New Year’s resolution if you want (it’s still close to January), or not if those seem to melt with the snow for you, but make the choice to do more with those closest to you.
Be present with and for those you love. The world needs more mothers and wives that will give their children and spouses the love they need.
For inspiration, but not to compare yourself with, go to nieniedialogues.blogspot.com and read her whole blog from the beginning. There is a wife and mother that savors her husband and children, with a heart-rending tragedy along with it.

**Many thanks to Sage for sharing this glimpse into her heart!

Add a Good Cause to Your Blog

2009-01-01T09:05:00.004-05:00

An Inspiring 10 year old Divorcee

2009-02-04T13:15:00.001-05:00

This story is absolutely amazing!

WHAT YOU CAN DO:
Stand up for yourself

Fight Spinal Muscular Atrophy by Signing This Petition

2009-02-02T09:07:00.002-05:00

I wanted to quickly introduce myself--my name is Devon and my son Dakin has an untreatable, incurable neuromuscular disease called Spinal Muscular Atrophy with Respiratory Distress (a rare variant of "regular" Spinal Muscular Atrophy (SMA)).

I'm writing because I wanted to let you all know about a petition that is being circulated on the net at http://www.petitiontocuresma.com/. It is in support of landmark legislation (The Spinal Muscular Atrophy Treatment Acceleration Act) to allocate already existing funds from the National Institutes of Health toward SMA research, treatment and cure. SMA is the number one genetic killer of children under 2. Approximately 1 in 6000 babies born will be afflicted with SMA, and about 1 in 40 people are genetic carriers of SMA.

Since it is so "common", a lot of time and research has gone to understanding it--it is a very well understood disease and is close to treatment and possibly a cure. My son's variant is not the same genetic mutation as "regular" SMA, and is so rare (according to our research he is the fifth diagnosed case in the US) that there is no money being thrown behind it for research or a cure--not that we're aware of in the US, anyhow. So we are throwing our weight behind this petition in the hopes that Dakin might gain collateral benefit from anything that comes from the Act. The petition is quick and easy to sign, and you can be listed anonymously if you like.

I thought I'd write and inform you guys about this since this is an easy way to help out these poor children (and possibly my sweet little boy). There are a host of other diseases that will benefit from the Act being passed as well, such as Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy, ALS, Parkinson's Disease, and many more. Thank you!

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Sign the petition HERE

Read more about Devon's little boy HERE

**Many thanks to Devon for sharing this simple way for us to help!

Compassion Blogging

2009-01-30T10:00:00.000-05:00

I found this on Forever and Always and thought you might want to check it out.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:
"Sign up and every month you’ll be given another reason to blog about Compassion: a push for mosquito nets, AIDS prevention, writing letters to sponsored children, etc. Join bloggers around the world in posting for Compassion monthly." --Compassion Bloggers

Service Scavenger Hunt

2009-01-27T09:08:00.001-05:00

As a parent, sometimes it is hard to teach the "Joy of Serving Others” to children. This past Christmas Eve day- I was busy with preparations for the upcoming night and was frustrated by my children’s lack of imagination. I have four boys and they each had a couple of friends over playing video games. As I looked at the many things needed to be done at our house, I quickly sat at our computer and made a list. But not wanting to start WW3 on Christmas eve, I thought of turning our chores into a game. I titled it : A Service Scavenger Hunt and proposed this game/competition to the gang. I explained they had an hour and a half to do as many service acts as possible and earn as many points as they can. The reward at the end would be chocolate chip cookies- the winning team getting the most. The boys eagerly divided into teams.

Service Scavenger Hunt
Please have people sign by the service act for points to count

5 points: (2-5 min worth of work)
Read a book to a small child (3 or 5 year old)
Sort a fold a bunch of socks
Pull weeds
Re-stack books on a bookshelf nicely
Vacuum a floor
Sweep

10 points: (10-15 min worth of work)
Mop a floor
Wash a car
Walk a dog
Fold a basket of laundry
Wash dishes

15 points: (15-20 min worth of work)
Mow a lawn
Clean and pick up a room
Wash windows for someone
Clean a bathroom

The boys happily raced off- volunteering to do service to neighbors and their own families. I was pleased one of my sons stayed behind and volunteered to help me. What a sweet spirit of service filled our home as boys returned with papers filled out, sharing what service jobs they did and for who. Our phone started ringing with neighbors thanking me for this crew of helpers as families prepared for Christmas Eve parties and guests coming to visit. They were delighted to have small children read to, windows washed, weeds pulled, etc.

We live in a small town, in a town house complex, knowing most of the owners. Another reason this was so successful is- the participants were from a couple different families. So many teams ran to their own houses and offered to do chores for their parents to get points. I realize not everyone has this type of close knit community but the spirit of the activity can be adjusted to fit your circumstances. Maybe send them out to shovel walks and drive ways, salting path ways for your neighborhood. Maybe take the group to your community park and give them trash bags to collect rubbish. Then give points for the biggest item, the strangest item - be sure to use gloves, etc.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Make a Scavenger Hunt list for your family. Then give them a week to try and secretly do each item on the list, without being asked. Items could be: fold a load of laundry, sit and read to a younger sibling, set the table, take out the trash, etc.
Host a Service Scavenger Hunt party. Make a list of things kids could do for your neighbors, rake leaves, shovel side walks, weed flower beds, mow lawns, wash cars, etc.Send them out for a few hours then have them come back and report while enjoying a treat themselves.

My name is Laura, but I am referred to as SWIRL on my blog. I have four boys and am always trying to find fun ways to motivate us to do things we should do.

**Many thanks to Laura for this FUN piece!!

Write For Us!!!

2008-11-10T10:00:00.019-05:00

There are so many opportunities out there to just do a little bit more, to make the world just a little bit better. That's why we need YOU! Not only will our voice be louder if we speak as one, but our capacity will be greater if more people contribute to writing what they feel passionate about.

Our invitation is pretty simple and straightforward, we're looking for two types of posts:

Inspirational Features. We want to celebrate unsung heroes who are improving the world in small and simple ways; women who are doing more. If you know of someone who fits this description, write a tribute to them and we'll post it for the world to see.
Educational Take Action Posts. We're always looking to learn more about what's going on around us so that we can contribute and make a difference.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Write a post and send it to: womendoingmore@gmail.com

Be sure to include:

A Title
Background Information: Tell us what you care about and why we should care about it too. (Note: we'll publish any quality piece, but we find pieces 300 words or less are more likely to be read in their entirety.)
What You Can Do: Tell us what we can do; please try to include at least one action item that doesn't require money.
Signature: Name or Link to your personal blog
Suggested Labels
Biography: If this is your first time writing for us, will you please add a short paragraph of biographical information so we can introduce you to our readers? Thank you!

**Please bear in mind this site is intended to have a kind, compassionate voice. Above all, our goal is to help those who need help and to inspire those who are capable of helping.

Finding a Cure for Diabetes

2009-01-24T07:10:00.002-05:00

Diabetes has had a terrible impact on my family and many other families. I am sure you know a friend or a loved one that has been affected by diabetes. My son Ethan was diagnosed with type 1 diabetes nearly 5 years ago.

The diagnosis was heartbreaking. As a parent you try to do everything you can to help your kids and keep them safe. When the doctor said "He has diabetes" my heart ripped in two.

I changed that day. I had something to fight for. A cause. Some direction. I went home and started doing research - read everything I could get my hands on. We enrolled in studies. We taught him about his disease. And most importantly we found an organization to put our time and energy into. The Juvenile Diabetes Research Foundation is our charity of choice. They are the ones that are raising the money and doing the research and finding the breakthroughs that will lead to a cure. Most importantly, they focus on finding a cure for type 1 (juvenile) diabetes. Not education. Not type 2. FINDING A CURE.

Every year I support them and raise money for the Walk to Cure Diabetes - but this year I am taking it up a notch. I just signed up to do the Ride to Cure Diabetes in June. I am going to bicycle 105 miles in one day in Sonoma Valley, California. This will be done along with hundreds of other riders from across the country. We will spend 4 to 6 months (and hundreds of hours) training our bodies and raising funds to find a cure. Our goal: is to raise $3.2 million to fund research to find a cure for diabetes and its complications.

A few things you should know – because no great story is truly great without a little drama:

1. I don't own a bike. For real. (I do plan to buy one in the very near future)

2. I have never ridden a mile on a bike - much less 105 in one day. Sure I do spin class - but that bike doesn't move. As far as real bikes go, I haven't ridden one since I was a kid.

3. I am aware that economic times are tough and I am trying to scale a pretty big mountain to meet the minimum fund-raising requirement of $4200.

4. Now that I am signed up I am committed. If I can't raise the $4200 I have to pay it myself.

5. I am a little insane. I have 5 months to raise the money and get my buns in shape.

6. All of these things hit me like a freight train at 3:03 in the morning when I woke up in a cold sweat.

I'm writing to ask for your support because each of us can make a real difference. In order to participate in this ride I must raise a minimum of $4200 by June 1, 2009. And every little bit helps! Your donation is tax deductible.

Together, we can make the cure for diabetes a reality.
Ethan, my family and I thank you in advance for your support.

All the best,

Tiburon Erickson
http://www.utahtib.blogspot.com/

WHAT YOU CAN DO:
Please visit my Ride Web page if you would like to donate online or see how close I am to reaching my personal goal: http://ride.jdrf.org/rider.cfm?id=8668

A Dying Wish

2009-01-22T09:14:00.001-05:00

Have you ever been asked, if today is the last day, or you have three months, or what would your last meal be?The last two days I have heard both, and not just once,

but more than any other given time.

I have been brought to a pondering place.

Given more than a moment of reflection to the above.
What if I had three months,

what would my last meal be?

What would I do with my dying wish?

One little girl knew exactly what she would do:
(link to the video, if you wish, or read below)
http://www.abc4.com/mediacenter/local.aspx?videoid=89206@video.ktvx.com&navCatId=5

A Pleasant Grove, Utah, family dedicated their reflection of gratitude, and dying wishes to their daughter, Stephanie. Stephanie was born with something called Spinal Muscular Atrophy or SMA. She never had the promise of a long life. Her baby brother was born with the same disease. Knowing that she would die, and that her brother would as well, she made a declaration, she had a wish. She wanted a garden, a secret garden, taken from the childhood book The Secret Garden that was often read to her and she found peace in dreaming of.

Make a wish foundation made it possible for her.

for full news story, written, see:
http://www.abc4.com/content/news/top%20stories/story.aspx?content_id=c506eea5-4e17-4859-b9e0-ac5c7f4d5d22

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Donate time or funds to Make a Wish Foundation
Volunteer at the children's hospital....talk with terminally ill children
Find other terminally ill children programs for volunteering in your area
Offer to support familys who have lost children
Be thankful for your blessings

**Many thanks again to Stacie for taking time to compose this lovely piece.

Book Club For Boys

2009-01-19T09:00:00.000-05:00

Believe it or not, Book Clubs aren’t just for people who like to read.I'm a mom of four typical, busy, active, competitive, and energetic boys. My boys would rather launch off a couch than sit on it and read, so I've had to be creative in finding ways to encourage them.

When my oldest son, was struggling to read as a first grader his teacher suggested he repeat the grade. Instead, I decided we would double our efforts at home to get him up to grade level. Around the same time some friends of mine started a Mother/Daughter book club; at first I felt left out, but I soon realized this was a great idea for boys, too! I quickly organized a book club just for boys. Four years later, when he was in 5th grade and reading at an 8.6 reading level I knew I had found a successful way to help boys read.

I started www.Bookclub4boys.com to share my ideas and book club outlines with other families. I’ve found hosting a book club for boys and specifically for reluctant readers is a little different than traditional book clubs. Traditional book clubs, the members like reading. My book club outlines focus on encouraging boys to read and finish the book by having incentive games. We also do activities to help boys connect to the books they read. My sons would still rather spend their time outside being "rough and tumble" or playing computer/video games, but the exciting difference is that now they can read and do read because they have an extra incentive--the next Book Club meeting!

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Read to you child 15 min every night.
Host a book club for your child.
Subscribe to a kid magazine that might interest your child. Ranger Rick is a great magazine full of colorful pictures and small easy to read articles. For reluctant readers, an article is less intimdating than a book.
Look for computer games that require reading to play. Nintendo Dogs is just one example.

Welcome Laura

2009-01-19T08:58:00.000-05:00

We're thrilled to welcome Laura Blum as a writer for Women Doing More:

Laura is a mother of 4 boys and likes to find creative ways to motivate her family to do things they should do. She blogs at www.girlinaswirl.blogspot.com, it's one space for her to be a girl. She also can be found at www.Bookclub4boys.com a site dedicated to encouraging reluctant readers to read. Family Fun Magazine February 2009 is spotlighting Laura as their Mother of the Month mentioning her work with book clubs for boys.

The Gift of Life

2009-01-15T10:26:00.000-05:00

You give but little when you give of your possessions.
It is when you give of yourself that you truly give.
~Kahlil Gibran

I’ve been thinking about this economic crisis we’re experiencing and considering how we can give to others if we’re not financially in a position to contribute. Plenty of ideas came to mind, many of which are listed here on this blog. But I thought I’d share a story about someone who gave of himself (literally) to bless the life of another.

I’ll take you back to when I first met him. I was a lonely college girl sitting on my windowsill pondering about my future husband and I wrote a poem entitled “Where are you?” It was about the man I would someday marry. The last few lines are as follows:

“Maybe you’re far, far away,
Maybe you’re next door.
When you find me, will you stay?”

It turns out that my future husband really was next door when I was writing that poem! He had been my neighbor for 6 months, but I didn’t know it. We ended up meeting in a college class a couple months after I wrote the poem and we both felt an immediate connection. But there was a problem… he had looong hair. Call me shallow, but to be honest that just wasn’t the look I was attracted to, plus I didn’t think he was the kind of guy I would feel comfortable taking home to my parents. But we developed a wonderful relationship and quickly became best friends. Shortly thereafter, he revealed why he was growing out his hair… it was for Locks of Love, an organization that makes wigs for children with long-term medical hair loss. I swear I fell in love at that moment! He was also a regular blood donor and for one of our very first dates he took me to donate blood! (I mean, talk about a keeper!)

So I guess I shouldn’t have been surprised when he brought up the idea last year of donating a kidney to a complete stranger. He was doing some research about other ways he could give (since his hair had been rejected since it was turning gray), and he was shocked when he learned that due to lack of available donors in the United States, 3,916 patients had died while waiting for a kidney transplant in 2006. When he mentioned that he was considering donating one of his, I immediately had some questions. I remember his matter-of-fact response when I asked him why. “Well, I have two, I only need one, and it could save someone’s life! So it’s a no-brainer.” But we had more questions to consider including, "What are the risks involved? (minimum) Will the remaining kidney be able to compensate for the loss? (yes) What happens if down the road a family member needs a kidney?" (we'd hope another family member or friend would donate) We both had lots of questions to consider, and we recognized it was not a decision to be taken lightly. So after praying about it, and consulting with our family and church leaders, we decided that it was the right choice for us.

On November 15, 2007, after going through months of testing and evaluations, the day finally arrived. I think I was more nervous than he was, but I tried to focus on the life he was going to bless. During our stay in the hospital, we had the opportunity to meet that life and his family. It was a special moment that was sweet beyond description for all involved. Now, over a year later, both the donor and the recipient are enjoying good health and have a special bond. I am so grateful that the man with the long hair turned out to be the man of my dreams. He is not only my hero, but a literal hero to someone in need.

My purpose in sharing this story is not to pressure anyone else to do this, but rather to inspire you to consider all the opportunities that are out there to give even during this time of financial crisis.

WHAT YOU CAN DO:

Consider the following opportunities to help save lives:

Donate Blood:
Find a blood drive and set up an appointment.
If you’re ineligible to donate, click here for other ways you can help.

Donate Hair:
Learn about organizations that make wigs for those in need

Donate Bone Marrow:
Learn about bone marrow donations

Donate an Organ:

Learn about organ and tissue donations

FAQ about Kidney Donations